Kayans of Sarawak Heartland | Suspension bridge and Suspended hopes

Pix | Kayan Elder, Aban Jau Ing (with bamboo staff) [The Borneo Post]

For Aban Jau Ing and other senior Malaysian citizens of Kayan origin deep in the Sarawak heartland, heaven can wait.

Sighing he says, "My wish [is] to see the bridge before I die".

No one should have to wait for heaven. Not that there's any berth booked for us. You'd be lucky to catch a glimpse of Ratzinger near the Pearly Gates. But, timber companies operating in the area shouldn't have much problem. In fact they wont even get a parking ticket from psudo-guardians of the Sarawak top quality timber-rich forests.

Deep in the heart of Sarawak's heartland, there are murmers. Not raucuous as the Red Shirts; no ear shattering din; no march with petitions. In fact these are ideal citizens of the Barisan National Government. All they want is to go to heaven. Perhaps, the BN Government don't like addresses in heaven. There are no forest to log and no taxes to collect.

In the valleys of the Apoh River, past some ox-bow lakes, they built a 115-door longhouse long ago known as Long Atip. That's something like almost half a mile long. It's the longest house in Sarawak or the world. You could keep fit visiting your cousin if you both live at house ends. Rather puzzling that Apco did not spin this. They could have told PM Najib to build the Suspension Bridge last month and hype that on a "1Longhouse" jingle from the greenest "1Jungle". Well, Apco can only unbreak suspended hopes. Government contractors had left a long slab of concrete meant for a suspension bridge and that was it.

Meanwhile, the longest house is the raging number 1 fire risk in the world. Even with fire extinguishers, these people will only survive with broken dreams and dashed hopes.

Maybe heaven is near from high, with or without Bomba. Sarawak State Elections are just round the corner, some say.

But everything is long in Long Atip. Long walks, long boat trips, long hopes. Deep long sighs. And a long wait for heaven, here or thereafter.

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HULU SELANGOR | No Foot Soldier for PR candidate

Pix | REUTERS/Bazuki Muhammad

Some observers have thought that PR would not offer a good candidate if BN fields out a candidate of dim lustre for Hulu Selangor. So the onus is on the controversy ridden PKR to begin the name game. They have and its Zaid Ibrahim. High time they let Zaid do something interesting or he'll be bored.

It's now left for the "Melayu-strung" UMNO Selangor to make their move.

Many now know Zaid is a politician for all Malaysians, not less, the Malays.

For Sibu, SUPP seems to have chosen, a next-of-kin to replace Robert Lau, once dubbed as the King of Toilets by the Star! Sorry, not chosen, but rather "bequeath" ! It's some kind of family inheritance. BN have always been a crony party. Haven't they? Dulu, kini dan selamanya?

In any case, with what's happening in the Defence Ministry we need some people with stature and seriousness to get on with real work.

Corruption | BN's Achilles heels in Bunnies combat shoes

Industrial shoes with 2-ton crash proof integrity on the toes last for at least 5 years or longer. These cost something like RM2,000 or more now and they're used in work places that's rule bias on top safety at work. This means even clearical staff in the management wears them, in case something heavy drop on those precious toes. A thousand of these staff members will cost some RM2.0m only and for 5 years and that's just RM400k a year. Put in another RM30k p.a. and you'll get a system of a small unit of people stretching the shoes life to 10 years. They're worth investing in for suits against negligence.

But why are civilian staff of the Defence Ministry garbed with these shoes? And why ladies? Are they combat bunnies? Where are they assigned? In the submarine that is shy of diving?

It just beats governance that this has slipped through or been slept through. It might be good for our economy as these can be manufactured in Old Klang Road for RM27.5m but really costing RM0.900 m. The gross markup will boost our GDP and our deficit to 15%. We'll beat Greece yet! Perhaps, we'll beat genuine analysts' rosy predictions by proving them wrong. We'll still beat someone, anyway. Perhaps those combat bunnies are real patriots.

Considering the novelty hype on "1Malaysia" and NEM, PM Najib is kidding around. His GTP is really "Guna Tukang Pukau" APCO. In Tuan Melayu terms, "pukau" is what "dukuns" or witch doctors do. They've upgraded from pukau to spinning.

Where's the beef? Cut the fat and the grease, Mr PM. Even if the BN loses in the next general elections!

No matter, PR will just shoe you out!